u guys im fucking exhausted
Me: I have NO idea what to wear tonight.
FBI Agent watching me through my webcam: Well let us see some options.
Me, shocked, but also wanting help:
More you might like
- Me: *doesnt eat*
- Stomach: *hurts*
- Me: *eatS*
- Stomach: *also hurts*
- Me: ok u know what. fuck you
Top 3 phrases that’ll create sexual tension
- “Make me”,
- “oh really”,
- “is that so”
“prove it”
“What’s in it for me?”
“Wanna bet?”
“Scared, Potter?”
@cassieblack I dropped my phone on my face to tell you your comment had me lolling
Resident (standing in my isolation patient’s room on without ppe): “Why didn’t you tell me they were on contact?”
Me: “Well, I assumed the decades of education you have had would equip you to read the GIANT sign on the door, or possibly deduce the information since there’s an isolation cart RIGHT BESIDE the door. I might have over estimated you though, my b.”
Resident : (laughs)
Me doing the vows at my future wedding
(My future wife):
“I do”
(Me, doing my best Han Solo impression)
“I know”
me to the demon in the corner of my room: ain’t u got shit to do
Demon to me: I could ask you the same thing
undersoilanddirtt